Luke

On a rooftop off of Post Street
The Tenderloin
Monday afternoon

***

I can tell you the exact place and moment when I first said I was going to move to San Francisco.

My friend's and I had taken the trip from Sacramento to San Francisco, and (as tourists) of course our first stop had to be Pier 39 and Fisherman's Wharf. After getting clam chowder in a bread bowl from Guardino's, we snagged some empty tables outside of Castagnolia's. Looking up Jones St. toward Russian Hill, that was my moment.

That was the infatuation. The love of San Francisco came from seeing the people who inhabit it. The idealist's and the dreamers. The artists and the musicians and the writers, and even the waiters like me. The people who envisioned a better world, a world that was possible within our little city.

I went to Africa on a mission trip the summer after my freshman year of college, and after that eye-opener I could no longer accept the cookie-cutter lifestyle of the Sacramento suburb I was living in at the time. It was fake. I needed authentic.

San Francisco was authentic.

Growing up as a Christian, you find lots of people who are anything but authentic. I didn't want to be a fake Christian, and after going to Africa, I knew I had to do something that mattered with my life.

One amazing thing about San Francisco is that it has more non-profits than any other city in the nation. It has people who care. Who dream. I wanted to be like the people in San Francisco. I wanted to dream, to do things that mattered.

One thing that separated San Francisco from other places that I've lived is that in other places, if you share an idea with someone, they'll give you all the reasons why it won't work. They'll shoot you down more often than not.

In San Francisco, when you share an idea with someone, more often then not they are excited. People comment on how unique or original an idea may be. They ask what they can do to help.

I'm at a point where I'm asking you to help me. You see I'm committed to being one of those dreamers who do things that matter. I've been accepted to an internship in Belize, which will give me the chance to learn and grow, not only as a Christian, but as someone who cares about our world and our city. I know there are others out there with these same cares. I've seen you and I've met you, and you're what makes this city what it is.

I don't want to ask for your money, but I need to. So I want to give something back. My 1hundredproject gives me the chance to give something back to you. I'm going to ask for $100, but I want to make your trouble worthwhile. I want to make your life easier, and hopefully you can get to know me a little bit along the way. Allow me to help you with something. I'll paint your garage, babysit your dog, even take your daughter to homecoming. I might be asking for your money, I'm desperate to show why I hope you find me worth it.

1hundredproject is my idea to help make my dream of going to Belize a reality. I'd love for you to check out my idea, and maybe tell me some of yours, and maybe together all of us dreamers can make a better city and a better world.

***

You can see the rest of Luke's photo shoot here.

Luke's blog is http://lspray.wordpress.com/

and his Belize project is http://1hundredproject.wordpress.com/

Colleen

St. Boniface
Golden Gate Avenue, The Tenderloin
Friday noon

***

I want to tell you about The Tenderloin. My version of the Tenderloin. The Tenderloin can be a rough place, but I see a lot of little miracles here every day. I certainly do not want to romanticize the difficult things that the people of the Tenderloin have to deal with. But, I have seen a lot of beauty here, a lot of kindness, I have seen heartbreak and I have seen joy.

I am the Advocacy Coordinator at St. Anthony Foundation. Once, after introducing myself as St. Anthony's Advocacy Coordinator, I asked a group of high school aged volunteers if any of them knew what advocacy was. One young man raised his hand and said, "isn't that when you, like, don't have sex, or something?" I don't know if he was thinking of "abstinence" or "celibacy" - he surely wasn't thinking about advocacy.

Some people think of advocacy as "standing up for someone else." It can be that. Sometimes, it is that. But I try to do advocacy so that I give people a chance to speak up for themselves. Shame is one of the most debilitating side effects of poverty. Some people are so ashamed of being poor, of being homeless, of having to eat in a soup kitchen, that they feel like they are somehow less than human just because they need help. The opportunity to get involved in advocacy, to stand up for yourself, to use your experience to help other people who may find themselves in your situation someday, is one of the most powerful ways to banish shame. I'm lucky to work for an organization that prioritizes providing direct services like meals, medical care, and shelter as well as working for social justice.

This year has been an especially difficult one for advocacy. Our city and state budgets are a mess, and health and social service programs are on the chopping block. Actually, these programs are on the chopping block every year, deficit or surplus, but this year, our state and city deficits are so large that we may actually see some permanent cuts to programs that really help to save people's lives: drug treatment, welfare programs, child health, mental health, senior services, and homeless services. And, these cuts are coming at a time when more and more people need help.

One of the Governor's staff people said this to me recently: "When times are tough, hearts must harden." I'm sorry, but that sentiment just is not going to fly in the Tenderloin. What I see is that when times are tough, people are working even harder than ever to help each other out. City Hall and the Capitol really need to catch up to the Tenderloin in the heart-softening department.

One of the places in the Tenderloin that really makes my heart feel mushy is St. Boniface Church. During the day, the church opens its doors to people who simply need a safe place to be. The sound of the parishioners saying the rosary intermingles with the sound of snoring from the homeless folks asleep in the pews. Those snores are prayers, too: prayers of thanks for the sanctuary of the church, prayers of peace from those who have so little of it in their daily lives.

I could tell you stories from the Tenderloin that could make you cry. But I really see the Tenderloin as a place of resilience rather than a place of desperation. People who have been beaten down by life, who have faced challenges that seem insurmountable are here, pushing through every day, trying and trying to make it despite living through things that would make most of us give up. Please come visit us sometime, with your heart and your mind wide open. You'll see things that break your heart, but I guarantee that you'll also meet people who inspire you with their resilience and their spirit, despite the fact that they have nothing but the clothes on their backs and the strength in their hearts.

***

You can see the rest of Colleen's shoot here.

To learn more about St. Anthony Foundation, visit www.stanthonysf.org
Follow Colleen on Twitter: @crivecca

Michael

Outside Hospitality House
Turk Street, The Tenderloin
Friday noon

***

Michael passed by as I was taking photos of a new subject for i live here:SF. He asked if he could be a part, so of course I said yes.

Michael is a San Francisco native. He grew up in the Fillmore and watched it be destroyed by redevelopment efforts. He later became a construction worker to rebuild the Fillmore Center, the very area where he and his family was forced to leave.

Now he lives in the Tenderloin and is looking for a nice girlfriend.

Ace

Somewhere on O'Farrell Street
The Tenderloin
Sunday morning

***

I have only lived in the Tenderloin for the past eight months. Before I came to the Tenderloin, I was homeless. I can’t think of anything worse in the world than being left behind in a vacant house by a family whom I thought loved me. One day they were feeding me. The next day, they were gone. Word on the street though was that there was this lady who lived on the block who would leave out food for all the stray cats in the neighborhood. I’m not one to beg, but times were rough. I was hungry. I was lonely.

I started coming by the nice lady’s house to eat. She would be nice enough to leave her garage open so I could use the litter box and have a warm place to sleep. I have never been much of an outdoor cat so spending time in her garage was very inviting. The more time I spent in this lady’s garage, the friendlier the lady got. She would sneak me in the house from time to time and cuddle me. I really like that. I love human attention and interaction and missed having it on a regular basis dearly.

One day, the friendly lady wrapped me up in a blanket and put me in a car. I have to admit, I was terrified. I had no idea where this lady was taking me. I enjoy being inside a warm house, but I don’t like being in cars. I meowed the whole way and it seemed like an eternity to get to our destination. Our destination was San Francisco’s Tenderloin district. This is the day I met my human mom, Kathleen, and would no longer be homeless.

Here in the Tenderloin, I was introduced to my very own apartment. I had really good food that never seemed to run out. I had three big windows that faced a big backyard where I got to watch birds fly and rats run. I had a big, fluffy couch to sleep in the sun all day. I had a bunch of toys and a huge cardboard scratcher to lie on and scratch. I even had my own litter box. Most importantly, I now had a human mom to cuddle with anytime I wanted to and a home to call my own.

I know that a lot of people who live here in the Tenderloin are either lost or come to die. I know. I can hear them screaming at each other all day long as I look out my window. But I came to the Tenderloin to live. Living the good life here in the Tenderloin has made all those scary nights of living on the streets without food, water or human loving attention all seem worth it now. I am proud to call the Tenderloin my home.

***

Ace's mommy Kathleen is the blogger Cielo Gold and the SF Bartender at the Examiner.

You can see Kathleen featured previously on i live here: SF.

Kathleen

on a rooftop on O'Farrell

The Tenderloin
Sunday afternoon

***

I’m just as excited to live here in the Tenderloin today, as I was when I first moved here four years ago. I was born in the East Bay, grew up in Seattle and moved to San Jose a year after I graduated from high school. After the dot com bubble busted five years later, I decided that it was time to ditch my 9 to 5 job and go back to school full-time. A month after I graduated from San Jose State, I gave my car to my little sister and moved up to San Francisco, deep in the heart of the Tenderloin. I have never looked back.

I began my career as a bartender when I went back to school full-time at San Jose State. At first, my plan was to bartend my way through college so I could have the schedule flexibility to handle my full-time course load. After graduating and living in the city for a year, I worried about what I should be doing with the rest of my life. I decided at the time that I couldn’t possibly make a career out of bartending. That’s when I traded in my weekend night shifts for weekdays behind a desk, in a downtown office.

After working full-time in an office for a couple years, I realized that I was not happy being stuck inside an office building 8 hours a day, five days a week. I missed my nights behind the bar. I missed having my days free to pursue my creative interests. Once again, I ditched the 9 to 5 job and returned to bartending.

I’ve learned that I can make a healthy career out of bartending. Not only do I bartend a couple nights a week, but I also teach people how to bartend and write about my bartending experiences on a daily basis. My life revolves around bartending and I have never been happier.

I am proud to live here in the Tenderloin. In fact, most of the people who live in the TL are very proud of living here. When I tell people that I live in the TL, they just think of all of the crackheads, drug dealers, homeless people and prostitutes who litter the streets, but we have all walks of life here. We have all sorts of cool restaurants and bars. We are surrounded with local artists and local art galleries. Anything one could ever need is within walking distance or is a short MUNI ride away. The Tenderloin is such a central location in the city. It’s right in the middle of everything. The beautiful thing about the TL is that it is vibrant and full of energy. Day or night, there is always something going on here. There is never a dull moment in this part of the city.

There isn’t anywhere else in the city I’d rather be.

You can read all about my bartending experiences through my bartending blog at:

http://www.cielogold.blogspot.com

I also post daily on my Examiner.com page as the SF Bartender Examiner at:

http://www.examiner.com/x-6861-SF-Bartender-Examiner

I am also the founding editor for a local, underground zine called Xploited Zine which can be found online at:

http://www.xploitedproductions.com

***

The rest of Kathleen's photo shoot can be seen here.